How to Visit a Funeral and Cremation Ceremony in Thailand

There may come a time when you have to visit a funeral and cremation ceremony in Thailand. This may be to pay respect to a friend’s family member or your own loved one who has passed away. 

Thai funerals and cremation ceremonies are full of cultural and social etiquettes, much like many other societies around the world. But because they also differ from those other cultures, you should know in advance what to expect and what to do. 

In this guide, you’re going to discover everything you must know before visiting a funeral or cremation ceremony in Thailand, including dress codes, what to do, and what not to do. 

Disclaimer: This article may include links to products or services offered by ExpatDen’s partners, which give us commissions when you click on them. Although this may influence how they appear in the text, we only recommend solutions that we would use in your situation. Read more in our Advertising Disclosure.

Where to Go

A cremation in Thailand is normally held at a temple. It’s always a good idea to study the route before going there. 

Many temples inside the city have limited parking spots. So, if you plan to drive there, get there early. Otherwise, you may not be able to find parking. 

How Many Days Does a Funeral Last? 

In general, a funeral involves either three, five, or seven nights of monks chanting, followed by the cremation ceremony on the last day. 

Which Day Should You Go? And at What Time? 

This depends on the day and how close you are to the person who passed away. 

• If someone close to you passes away, it’s a good idea to go to the ceremony on as many days as possible. 
• In the event that someone not so close to you passes away, try to get there at least once. 

Also, it’s better to arrive at least 10 minutes before the ceremony starts. In many cases, the ceremony only involves an hour of monks chanting. 

Day One

There two main ceremonies of the first day of the funeral:

• Bathing ceremony: This ceremony normally takes place around 4:00 PM and is reserved for relatives or others who are close to the person who passed away. 
• Monk chanting: Normally starts after the bathing ceremony, around 6:00 PM, and is open to everyone.

If you are close to the person who passed away, it’s a good idea to go on the first day. 

Cremation Day

Cremation happens on the last day of the funeral and is also the most important day. If possible, you should go on this day. 

There are two ceremonies that happen:

• Food offering at lunch: This is mainly reserved for relatives. 
• Cremation process: Anyone can visit, and it usually begins at 3:00 PM or 4:00 PM.

Other Days

The ceremony normally starts at 7:00 PM and lasts for an hour. 

Dress Code 

Here’s how you should dress when visiting a funeral in Thailand.

• Wear black or white clothing. If you don’t have clothes of those colors, gray or dark blue is acceptable in many cases. 
• Dress politely.
  • Men should wear at least a polo shirt, slacks, and shoes that cover the toes. Wearing a suit isn’t always necessary.
  • Women should wear dresses.

Also, both men and women should avoid wearing bright colors, revealing clothing, shorts, tank tops, and sandals. 

What to Do

Here’s what you can expect once you are at the funeral and cremation ceremony.

Funeral

• Arrive 15 minutes before the ceremony 
• If you’re Buddhist:
  • Take three incenses, sit down, worship the Buddha statue, and then prostrate three times
  • Take one incense, sit down, and prostrate for the deceased one time
  • When the monks are chanting, bring your hands to a praying position and join the ceremony
  • During the water-pouring ceremony, put your hands in a praying position or touch the person next to if they are of the same sex
• If you’re not Buddhist:
  • Skip the Buddha statue worship step 
  • Sit down in front of the deceased person and pray
  • When the monks are chanting and during the water-pouring ceremony, feel free to join. You may or may not want to put your hands in a praying position, depending on your own beliefs. 

After the ceremony, it’s also common to take a picture with the family of the deceased in front of the coffin and a picture of the deceased person. Do not smile unless the family of the deceased smile. 

It’s also common for family members of the deceased to provide either snack boxes or food.

Cremation Day

Advertisement

There are more steps involved on cremation day. And the ceremony may differ depending on the province. 

That said, it normally goes like this:

• A mourning ceremony where family members talk about the history of the deceased person.
• Robe ceremony; unless you are the one who has to offer robes to a monk, you sit and participate in the ceremony.
• After that, someone will distribute sandalwood flowers. Pick one for yourself, but do not pick one for others. It’s a cultural belief. 
• Then, the coffin will be carried around the crematory site three times with everyone walking along. You can walk with them.
• Finally, there’s the cremation ceremony, which normally includes:
  • A mock cremation in which everyone places a sandalwood flower on a plate near the coffin.
  • A coffin opening ceremony in which a monk or master of the ceremony opens a coconut and uses the coconut water to wash the face of the deceased person. Only relatives and close friends can join this ceremony because it’ll be their last chance to say goodbye to their loved one.
  • The real cremation ceremony in which you place a sandalwood flower for a second time.

A family of the deceased person may also give you a gift for joining the cremation ceremony as well. 

After the cremation ceremony, the family of the deceased will be the last to leave. They will come back the next morning to collect the ashes then proceed to the scattering of the ashes ceremony. 

Read our article on What to Do When a Foreigner Dies in Thailand to find out more. 

What Not to Do

There are three main things you must not do when participating in the funeral and cremation ceremony.

• Dress improperly; it’s considered disrespectful. 
• Chat loudly during the ceremony; you should refrain from talking.
• Pass the sandalwood flowers to others; this is considered bad luck.

Other than that, common funeral and cremation etiquette applies. 

How Much Money Should You Give? 

When participating in a funeral or cremation ceremony in Thailand, it’s common to give money to relatives of the deceased person to help cover the cost of a funeral, which can easily exceed THB100,000. 

The amount of money you should give depends on two factors:

• How close you are to the deceased person and his or her family
• Your financial status

In general, THB500 is the common amount. If it’s someone close to you, it can be THB1,000 to THB2,000. Sometimes, the donation amount can be lower or higher depending on the relationship and financial situation of everyone involved. 

There are two ways you can give money:

• Ask for a white envelope and put the cash in there. You may or may not write your name on the envelope.
• You can ask for bank account details and transfer money. 

Is There Anything Else You Should Give? 

In addition to money, it’s also common to send funeral wreaths to the family of the deceased person. This is normally done by a group or organization. 

For example, if you run a company in Thailand and a family member of your employee passes away, it’s a good idea to send a funeral wreath on behalf of the company. 

Alternatively, there are also “donation fans.” These are fans you’d find in any house in Thailand, except the bottom half is covered in flowers, and the middle contains a message of condolence. The fans are donated to either the family or the temple after the cremation ceremony. 

What If You Can’t Visit a Funeral or Cremation Ceremony? 

If you can’t make it, you can send a condolence message and some support money. 

But if someone close to you, your loved one, or a good friend passes away, try your best to get to the funeral or cremation ceremony because it’ll be an important event for the grieving family. 

Now, on to You

A funeral is an important event in Thailand. If you have to participate in one, remember to dress properly. 

Other than that, do just as you would back home — show respect to those who are mourning and refrain from being loud. If you aren’t sure what to do in each ceremony, you can do as others are doing. Or just ask someone who’s sitting next to you. They would be glad to guide you through the process.